Thursday, June 4, 2009

Match Pricks: We don't die, we multiply

BEIJING (AP) – A massive police presence ringed China's iconic Tiananmen Square on Thursday, the 20th anniversary of the bloody crackdown on pro-democracy activists, as the government continued an overwhelming drive to muzzle dissent and block commemorations.
The heavy security moves come after government censors shut down social networking and image-sharing Web sites such as Twitter and Flickr, and blacked out CNN when it airs stories on Tiananmen. Dissidents were confined to their homes or forced to leave Beijing, part of sweeping efforts to prevent online debate or organized commemorations of the anniversary.

Twenty years after June 4, 1989, Colin and I here at Match Pricks are taking a different stance. We're with this guy:

See, keeping quiet right now, going away and not bothering anybody – and, admit it, you thought we had done just that – is exactly what Jintao wants you to do. He doesn't want you to know that Chelsea might have (or might not have) thrown £73 million at Milan to try and outspend Real Madrid in the race to whisk Kaká away from Silvio Berlusconi's lecherous and roaming little fat fingers. He wants little to do with your talk of Kia Joorabchian and who he's pimping Carlos Tevez to these early summer days. Jintao would prefer it if you simply forgot David Villa exists.

That's not where Match Pricks stands, friends. We're standing with freedom – all summer long, dogg. If Ronaldo takes a dump while perusing a Zagat's review of Madrid restaurants, we'll be there. When Franck Ribéry passes through customs at any airport in Europe, we'll tell you the nationality of his car driver. As Mark Hughes opens another glowing briefcase full of riches as he sits behind his desk one pleasant, sunny morning three weeks from now, we'll tell you which precocious Brazilian he'll start eyeballing.

See, it's the silly season. Anything goes. Remember that elaborate, long-distance handjob Ronaldo gave Madrid last year? That act is chicken shit in the summer of '09. One of the papers launched a possible Madrid shopping list that included Ronaldo, Kaká, Ribéry, David Villa and Xabi Alonso. Loll that one around on your tongue for a few minutes and tell me you're not feeling that shiver running up your leg right now. Hell, The Independent says Gary Megson has put a £20 million valuation on Gary Cahill!

Most people hate the summer transfer season. They find the endless rumors and back-and-forth contradictions of agents, managers, players, WAGs, owners and personal masseuses leaking self-serving info to grubby journalists to be deplorable. So does Jintao. He doesn't want anybody thinking about Tiananmen and the June 4 massacre, and Jintao sure as hell doesn't want you thinking about what your favorite football team might look like come opening weekend of the 2009-10 season.

Not us. We love it, and Match Pricks is ready to roll around in all of it. Bring on the shenanigans. For summer '09 and all it entails, we're taking the stance of the guy on the left in this photo:


BroadwayJoe said...

Fireworks spontaneously started going off in my living room as I read this.

Anonymous said...

Yeah baby! That's why I read this website.